You are reading the post from “Things I Noticed” on my site.

Here are few things from my past week that caught my attention -

1. Internet Finds - I found all the letters written by Vincent Van Gogh in digital form - Link.
   
   What a pleasure it is to find such gems.
   

2. Thought I am pondering over -
   

   When does this suffering end? is such a beautiful question to ask oneself.
   
   It does several things at once.

   
   It questions the existing pain that you have been carrying;; not lessen it but help you carry the weight a little while longer. It replaces the desperate search for an opposite of suffering that we cannot imagine with a quieter curiosity. It gives meaning to the chaos our mind thinks it is.
   

3. Few best clicks from my film archive -

This shot was when I was driving back home from work. I took a turn and saw these lights illuminating the entire cart and its surrounding. That bunch of lights basically was lighting all around and it was around 10pm. So, while capturing I was skeptical of the shot but extremely happy with the way it came out.1 Gives me courage to shoot at night with proper light setup.

A beautiful shot of the park with ample detailing in the foreground, middleground and background. It was sunset time, and the light was starting to turn goldden yellow to ornage. So, that was seen in the light hitting the trees in the foreground and background.

There is another click of kids playing near the pond that I captured from far (link) which I like but was bllurred due to rapid click. I was supopsed to stay and click the moment but was nervous and scared. Hopefully I become confident to click people the way I want to and bring out beautiful films.

You are reading the post from “Things I Noticed” on my site.

Here are few things from my past week that caught my attention -

1. Things I noticed - A flower older than 32000 years were bloomed.

   I saw a post about on Instagram about a flower blooming after 32000 years because a squirrel preserved the immature seeds. However, the post did not confirm the date of this news.

   
   Well, I was curious and found an article from National Geographic (Link↗)

   
   The page states - A Russian team discovered a seed cache of Silene stenophylla, a flowering plant native to Siberia, that had been buried by an Ice Age squirrel near the banks of the Kolyma River (map). Radiocarbon dating confirmed that the seeds were 32,000 years old.
   

   The mature and immature seeds, which had been entirely encased in ice, were unearthed from 124 feet (38 meters) below the permafrost, surrounded by layers that included mammoth, bison, and woolly rhinoceros bones.
   
   Imagine what all are preserved or unfound by us.

   
   I alway have a fear of the oceans. They hold secrets that even skies might fear I believe.
   

2. Movies I Watched - A beautiful mind, Hoppers, Project Hail Mary, They Will Kill You.

3. A thought that lingered - I dont think I am a good human to be a serviceman of god.

   
   I think god created us to be humans first and then serve god. But, with things going on around us, we are slowly loosing grip on what it means to be humans.
   

4. I started a film photography page -

   
   If you know me, I am a huge fan of photography. To freeze a moment in time, that has a story or a meaning is something I always wanted to do, and with the workshop I attended in Early February, Film photography is what I thought suited my hunger for story.
   
   Film photography is moment captured but with uncertainty of the results. it is solely for me to capture a moment - rest all is me trusting and hoping it comes good. Atleast until I become familiar with the mechanics and then I can play around with the way I want my image to look.
   
   I post photos that are my archive of film captures that I think are the best of the bunch and share occasional mishaps and out of focus shots here.
   
   Link↗

5. My First Film camera click:
   
   I click the first picture of my family in the kitchen. It was out of focus as I am still learning but the meaning it captured was beautiful to me.

   

   The left burn indicates it was the first film of the roll and I am happy with it staying this way.
   

Everybody talks about the movie A Beautiful Mind and immediately praise the protagonist’s character for distinguishing reality from the mind’s games of a disorder that we still don’t fully have a cure for, but only a few notice the empathy shown throughout the film.

In the middle of his initial treatments for schizophrenia, the doctor tells Alicia: Imagine if you suddenly learned that the people, the places, the moments most important to you were not gone, not dead, but worse, had never been. What kind of hell would that be?

With this, Alicia understands his suffering. His beautiful mind has been playing tricks on him all along. So she stands by him and offers help gently. Nash does not believe what everyone tells him: that his roommate, his roommate’s nephew, and Parcher are not real. He is forced to battle it out alone, which in return was hurting his wife and child.

Yet he chooses to believe they are real, and that the Russian is after him for answers. As the days go by, his intuition and fears grow darker, and he isolates himself, causing his wife to fear for him.

The day he realizes that the nephew is not aging, he runs after his wife, who is about to leave out of fear, and tells her what he has discovered: the nephew he sees has not aged.

This subtle hint gives her the confidence that Nash is in his right mind, and she returns home to help him.

WhenNash speaks his mind about him being unsure of the things around him; she shows him what is real and touches his face, she reminds him that touch, people who age, and these tender gestures help him find direction and confirm what is real.

From then on, Alicia looks after him, and together they move closer to Princeton, believing that being near what Nash loves will help. Nash also reconnects with an old friend, shows empathy, and lets the friend stay and work from the campus library.

Slowly, we see him change. We see him confronting the people in his mind, telling them that the journey ends there and that he will not react to their convictions.

We see him talking to students outside the library, helping them grow, learn, and understand concepts, even as he learns to ignore his own intrusive thoughts and fears.

This change happened because Nash chose to fight but also because of the people people around Nash who were empathetic for someone who was suffering.

How often do we find such empathy in the world now?

The world has made progress in curing so many diseases that we forget cures come only after the disease is identified. Before that, empathy, being surrounded by loved ones, and the ability to find joy in what we love come first, and then come cures, treatments, and the rest.

You are reading this post from “Things I Noticed” on my site.

Here are few things from past few weeks that caught my attention -

1. Things I noticed -

   It is starting to feel as if we are no longer looking for ways to socialize, and even though we do, it is mostly to drink and share our problems, or to have some work related meetings.

   
   Where are the days, where we meet to catch up, to play games, to watch movies, to sing songs, and more.
   
   I am actively, with all my heart trying to bring back more of the days where rooms were filled with laughter for a couple of hours - not more not less. Because, I realized, fun for a short amount of time is beautiful and one that is memorable.

   
   Slow living does not mean no fun at all (fun that relates to current ways of fun) and living as a monk, it means to choose the fun for a few hours here and there and then going back to the life you enjoy doing.

2. Movies I Watched - Taste Of Cherry (easily became my favourite film with my interpretation of the ending), Couple Friendly, Sentimental Value, Hamnet

3. A line pondering in my head-
   Desire is suffering. Choose the sufferings you would want to have till the rest of your life.

4. A photograph I clicked that I admire -

   I recently attended my friends wedding in Vizag and after attending the event, We were in Vizag for a few days and I think I clicked one of my favourite pictures using my mobile.
   

   

   
   

You are reading the post from “Things I Noticed” on my site.

Here are few things from my past week that caught my attention -

1. I noticed - Ika - A short film.

   Ika, a 15-min short film by Raam Reddy is an interesting watch which beautifully captures and delivers the meaning of creativity, imagination and how mediums don’t matter when story is beautiful.

   
   You get to understand film, story, and depth of lead characters with the help of his surrounding in a short span of time.

   
   What caught me the most was the ending scene where the entire film protagonist shot is being viewed by him on a static TV but shown to us from his eye is a masterpiece direction.

2. Movies I Watched - Send Help, Sore: A Wife from the Future

3. A Question I pondered - linear progress or horizontal progress?
   Is it better to go deep into one thing? Or to spread our attention across multiple interests, growing bit by bit in all of them?

   
   I personally think the second option gives more meaning (to me atleast)

   • You get to be busy on things you actually like doing

   • Never get tired and be stuck on one thing.

   • Constant amalgamation of ideas from different fields do come up and might help us back.

   
   What do you think?
   

4. A workshop I attended -

   I attended the analogue photography and print workshop this past weekend and It feels like it might become a pivotal moment; not just for a hobby, but for how I choose to spend my time.

   I always felt an immense pull towards making memories, writing about them, and telling a story - Now the medium might change but the story I want to convey remains unchanged or even makes it better.
   
   It allows me to be intentional. Much like the film Perfect Days, I want my days to be filled with things I choose to do; things I love doing. The discomfort of choosing will appear from time to time, but doing what we love feels like the point of it all.

   This workshop reminded me of that.
   

   I love clicking pictures. I love writing. I love learning about different things. In a quiet way, it felt like a pat on the back—you’re on the right track.
   
   I’m still waiting for the scans of the photos I shot and the print I made. For now, I have a few samples captured by fellow participants.

   

When Sore chooses to stop trying to change Jonathan so she can be with the person she loves for a longer time in the future - she asks him to stop smoking cigarretes, drinking alcohol, and suggests eating healthy, and exercising.

During this, we see her helping with all and never losing her smile in the process. She has a content look in her face of things being in her control and a hope that the future will change.

However, after failed attempts keep leaking her hope of change, she reaches a conclusion that people never change.

She chooses to go about her own life thinking distance might free her from the fate she keeps circling. She meets different people asking for job, and then meets Marko, a fashion boutique shop owner - who gives her a place to stay and a place to work.

A few days go by, she seems to adjust well in this new setting, everything looks okay, she gets better at the job, makes the place she lives beautiful, and keeps working for Marko.

When nothing seems to go wrong - enters Jonathan - who seems to still be with Elsa - who she knows will not be the end goal if not chased. So, she hesitates, leaves the room, comes back, when checking the fit for Jonathan, she stops herself from telling him that she is her wife from the future.

She watches - she listens and once she sees that Jonathan is still not doing good. She asks Marko - You said “There are three things time cannot undo: The past, the pain, and death's quiet truth.”

Marko, quietly nods - saying “Yes that's what I said”

“So you believe people can change?” asks Sore, while facing down, as if she knows the answer.

“Of course people can change. But, the change must come from within. Some people have trouble making peace with the pain and trauma. But they can change.”

Once she realized what Marko truly means; she hugs him, says thank you.

All this while, She was trying to change who he was based on what she knows. Which in turn must change the fate of both on the future. Ever since, she has been in the loop, she has been selfish giving Jonathan ultimatums rather than providing a space to heal.

She was guiding him to perfection so she can find more time with him in the future. Which Jonathan cannot understand because to him - his life is better the way it is.

However, once she realized - she slows down and allows for him to change from within but time had other plans.

Sore did not give trauma or had a bad past with Jonathan; but why should she allow Jonathan now?

Often times we think for the sake of relationship asking others to change will keep the relationship happy and in this case, the future of Jonathan even more longer as she states he dies.

But only lately I have realized that it is more about how we heal, how much are we willing to see our partner as a person just like us - with a past and a catalyst in our life.

These tiny things often feel of no importance but once realized are pivotal for people to remain together.

All the other glitter fades away but these moments if done right will etch a mark on the hearts of your partner. When years pass by, the one thing that is bound to stay is the space you give and the love you shower.

You are reading the post from “Things I Noticed” on my site.

I had three reasons to start/write these -

1. To be more aware of what I am consuming.

2. To structure and slowly improve my writing.

3. To share and document what stays with me.

Here are few things from my past week that caught my attention -

1. I noticed - The Lone Penguin

   This viral inspirational sensation of a lone penguin leaving the colony and walking to the distant mountains.
   Why? is the question I had in mind and when I saw the feed of the penguin walk while the director tells that even though the researcher brings him back to the colony, he immediately walks towards the mountains again for an entire day.

   
   The internet had different renditions of the reason and I could only imagine a story of lost lover calling him towards the mountains.

   
   On the documentary’s comments lies a beautiful rendition of why the penguin was walking towards the mountains -

   “I have no wings, so I can’t fly. I’ll climb the mountains, so I may touch the sky.”

   
   But it is fascinating to see the penguin recorded in 2007 shown to the world in 2008, is now viral on the internet.

   
   This goes to show personal stories, unique observations, and honest questions never go out of style and will be picked up to fame at some point or the other and you just have to trust and do to do the right thing and not worry about any other aspect.

2. Movies I Watched - Marty Supreme, Monster

3. A Question I pondered - Why are we embarrased to fail?
   Maybe it’s because of our childhood and how we were raised or maybe we don’t want to see ourselves be questioned, judged, or even laughed at.
   
   I am trying so hard to get out of my comfort zone, I want to say to people freely what I think without having any intent behind it, but scared to do so.
   
   I will have to learn how, but this feeling of embarrassment when we fail is something interesting? It makes us try harder next time or not touch it for the rest of our life. There is no inbetween. But what if there is?
   
   I remember, there were a lot of good moments from my past that I let go or did not perform well knowing that I would fail and embarrass myself.
   
   If only I would have fought that feeling and did it anyway.
   
   I cannot change the past now, but I can take tiny actions now to change from now on.

4. An Act I Noticed - Do babies instinctively know that something is dangerous.
   
   I never saw a baby being happy in an elevator. Similar to one I noticed this past week. The baby boy was visibly smiling when he was first seen while the door opened on a floor in between transite from fourth floor to ground floor. I noticed the baby looked around and saw the elevator door close.

   
   His face turned pale, he looked up and then down on his father’s shoulder and let out a big cry. It was as if to say this is not new to me and what is happening I am scared. As soon as we reached the ground floor, his father who was saying it’s nothing and patting the babys back,rushed front and said, see we are okay and when the teary eyed baby saw the open space, the people not so packed in - he let out a smile and watched his dad and smile grew even bigger.
   

5. Photograph I clicked -

   

When Robert sleeps on the ashes of his burnt home waiting for his wife and daughter, we see ourselves in his place - longing for someone or something to return that we most innately want to come back.

We unknowingly hope his wife shows up and from that moment on we become one with Robert until the end of the movie.

That sequence of Robert staying in denial and hoping they come back is felt by us at some point in our lives or we fear feeling it someday.

Despite all the struggles, Robert does one thing in silence - Hope.

He waits fighting internally for the return of his wife, his daughter and his whole life’s purpose. He stays in that bubble, for so long that later we see people calling him crazy; spoken so subtly in a conversation with Claire.

Later, one day when he finds a girl with bruises, running high temperature, hurting outside his home; he believes her to be his lost daughter who came back.

He carries the girl in his arms inside his home. The one that was rebuilt in anticipation, finally has a meaning of home.

He believes that the girl is his daughter and he gently cares for her but he is the one healing.

He later sits on the chair next to the girl and his face shines up finding his purpose again. He finally sleeps with a smile. He finds warmth in caring for her for those few hours.

When he wakes up the next morning, only to find the bed empty, and can’t seem to find her anywhere, he quietly accepts.

He realizes how many years has gone by, he then travels, flies on a plane, watches a man in the outer space on a television, and lastly looks himself in the mirror.

We see him becoming one with the nature on the very home he built at the end. He went away but the quiet fight of waiting for their return stayed.

We all are suffering silently. Lost in our own weight and we struggle to cope with it.

If only we can leave our baggage and start fresh, as a page turned.

But life don’t offer new pages. Atleast not without the heftiness of the ink on the previous paper.

Welcome to this section of my website called “Things I Noticed”.

These will be short, frequent notes shared via email specifically.

I had three reasons to start this -

1. To be more aware of what I am consuming

2. To structure and slowly improve my writing (in some way)

3. To share and document what stays with me.

Here are few things from the past couple of weeks that caught my attention.

Things I noticed

A CEO shared a post on Linkedin, addressing the newly promoted MDs in his company. He shared how inspiring it is to watch them grow into these leadership roles.

On this posts comment, a stranger congratulated the CEO on his promotion to MD and explained him how hardwork always paysoff.

Movies I watched

• Midsommar

• Train Dreams

A question I pondered over

Which comes first in a relationship? love or respect?

I was under the impression that love comes first because few years ago, when the topic came up in conversation, my parents said - it is love that comes first towards a person and then respect follows.

And I believed the opposite as my thinking was love comes anyway between two people when in close proximity along with other feelings that come.

As I live on, I feel both together gives life more meaning. But again, the question stays in my mind because lot changes based on what starts first and it differentiate in the way we live?

An act I noticed

A one-year-old child, sat quietly, eating her chocolate her grandfather had given her.

Her parents were busy working at the food stall.

She finished her chocolate, then looked at her parents, then walked to her elder brother probably three or four years old - and extended her hand.

No sound, no emotion.

He, who was watching a video on the phone, watched her hand and immediately gave his quarter eaten chocolate to her, without any hesitation.

The little girl quietly went back to her spot and started having this as if that was her battery to live.

A photograph I clicked, worth sharing

The breakfast spot is a two-wheeler with heat boxes that pack the items he has to offer. He halts at a crossroads not far from office but it is a five minute walk from our office building. The guy running the stall usually dresses in the same manner, a tailor stitched shirt under his fat wool knitted sweater, paired with beige track pants. He has one earbud plugged in his ear at all times and the other is open to listen to orders.

Set under an umbrella hanging from the top of his moped, he carries multiple items - Dosa, Uthappam, Upma, Mysore Bonda(not the regular size but the mini ones), Idly, and to go with these he even provides 4 types of chutney.

I particularly love the bonda with two varieties of white chutney made from peanuts, one is liquid and a bit subtle in taste with every spice perfectly added and the other one is solid chutney, almost a paste like consistency, with green chilies added as if to remove the cold from our ears.

These two along with the pudina chutney - compliments the Mysore bonda which he servers 6 pieces per plate and that taste… early in the morning is such a relief from the cold as if the spice wraps a blanket around your face.

As soon as the mix of chutney with the soft, oil fried bonda go in, the cold crispness around the mouth and nose fades first, then the spice kicks in and leaves us craving for more for the heat it gives out.

When I first went to have breakfast at this place, I asked how for the price and it shocked me - He said “Any plate you have in full is 20 rupees.”

No overselling, no underselling, straight answer and back to his work.

He was serving me what I consider a muffler around my ears in just 20 rupees.

I asked him when does he start preparing for him to be here so early. He mentioned his family including his mom, dad, and brother lend a hand and prepare all these before 4 am. Then go to sleep once he starts to bring them here.

When Priest Jud calls the forklift company and speaks to Louisa on the phone, the voice, tone, and pace with which he asks information tells the urgency he has to find the person and help him prove his innocence.

When his urgency was met with random information that is not needed to him, he gets frustrated and then Louisa offers a call back when she gets the information.

As he tries to end the call, louisa says - “Will you pray for me?”

When his urgency is met with the pain she silently passed in those words, he realises what his purpose was and questions his actions all that while.

The line - “Will you pray for me?” from Louisa hits Jud on his purpose and the tone of urgency immediately drops and the inner priest comes out.

The calmness he brings is innate and has come from a lot of his process to be and do good.

Which probably is why the first time Benoit Blanc meets him he says the line -

While watching the scene where the tone shifts - I had two thoughts

1. The quiet calmness in his voice hits harder than any noise and how he ends the call with louisa saying “you have my number, no matter day or night, I am here for you” is not something that only god can give but as a human who want to help others can provide other human beings and as he is a in the path of a priest, he calls to god.

2. The line Blanc says about Jud in the beginning when he first met and saw the goodness in him sets our minds in a positive note towards Jud and also shows how good of a detective blanc really is.

Watching this scene, I felt quietly confronted.

I tend to rush to provide my point of views, solutions or insights on their problems when people share something personal.

I offer thoughts, solutions, interpretations—often too soon. Maybe even before they’ve finished sharing their part.

Jud’s calmness reminded me that not everything shared is a problem waiting for my input. Sometimes, what people need is not clarity—but space. Space to be heard, to be seen as another human and to be present with them.

However, after hearing Jud say “I am here for you” - that gave me a sense of assurance that he will be someone whom I can share my troubles and felt heard.

To be that person for others—to be someone whose presence says “you can speak here”—feels like a personal achievement worth striving for.

Not for virality or for credits but as a human what can we give when we have nothing to offer but our shoulder to cry on, and our ears to hear other peoples problems.

I should not be jumping to put my 2 cents on their story and let them finish and more importantly not everything is a problem you have to solve.

Sometimes, the shoulder you offer gives more strength to fight their own battles than the solution you rush to provide.

This feeling gives birth to one question - “what did I do?”

So, to not feel so down and hopeless at the start of new year, let me reflect of the year that has gone by.

What counts to me as a good year? To think of it - a straight answer would be how many core memories did I create, what all moments made me feel happy and did I do good in some way to some extent to other?

2025 started with nothing but hope that it would be good. cannot remember what I was doing at that time honestly - whole of January is blank. No memories kick in.

February is the same - March - still nothing. April - nothing. May - Nothing.

Aahhh, the two things I remember from May is I started doing night shifts at work and it was hectic but worth it. I did it for 3 months.

So, the night shift ended in July and by then I was being a nominee to become a full time employee. I didn’t keep any hopes because life did not give me a chance to be excited even though I wanted to be very excited for it.

Life for the past few years was so stagnant and down for me that I was scared to be excited for new things that were coming my way.

However, things did start working out in my favour at the second half of this year. So, maybe I was worried for nothing and if it is meant to happen it will happen.

So, the other thing that happened to me duing May-July is I developed a crush on a girl and have told her after a lot of overthinking in order to not ruin the friendship.

To not be so coward in the things I want in life - with courage in heart, I did tell her how I want her and I to be more than friends and I like her - it turned out that she was committed to another guy.

I know what you are thinking.

How did you not know? Well, I did not. Maybe I did not ask her or I didnt care to ask her? or I was scared to ask that question so to not break my heart.

However, since that was not going to happen - that friendship also faded because once such feelings come in the way, it is hard for me to be friends and act normal. I would rather give space and not disturb her and my peace.

So, those two things happened and July was my birthday.

Ohhh, as I was writing I remembered one of the most beautiful moments I thought I would not say anytime soon but happened - How can I forget , RCB winning the IPL trophy for the first time in 18 years.

It was June 3rd, 2025 - exactly, a month before my birthday and after getting to know RCB is going to lift the trophy, the tears in Kohli’s eyes, the winning moment, how whole team came and were hugging kohli, how kohli and ABD met, how kohli met Ravi Shastri. How Anushka and Kohli hugged after winning, the team lifting the trophy, the celebrations by RCB fans not only by fans in that stadium but everywhere else - I remember there were fireworks on roads next to our office… ahh - chills. The first gift for my birthday came a month early with this moment.

July 3rd was my birthday and on that day the amount of gifts I was showered with - I cried in my bed later that night thinking of how lucky I am to have such friends.

To an extent I was thinking if I really deserved to be receiving such gifts and could not take it that these were for me to keep. But then the love showered on me by my parents, brother, and friends cannot be matched on that day. Will keep this in my heart forever.

August was all Coolie hype. The bus conductor single handedly saving Tamil industry with mixed responses is peak inspiration for me. before the interval there is a scene where he realises his friend (SatyaRaj’s character) says Powerhouse, so he drinks the powerhouse raw and then washes his face with it - that individual scene was paisa wasool.

And the flashback potion and the music was bang on with rajini’s presence. I was in that mode for the rest of the month. In that same month - got the oppurtunity to move to a specialist team working on microsoft products - so my hardworking days kinda began.

Honestly did not know much about this domain but now I am atleast taking in the issues and doing something compared to when I joined this team.

In spetember, my friend in the previous team was made full time employee in the company and I was really happy for him because he deserved this more than anyone else in the circle I know of. The role and responsibilities he took up while working truly were deserving. So, seeing him become a full time employee was really an inspiring moment and also a joyful moment for me. One of my close friends acheivement was my achievement in that moment.

So, whole of october and november was me trying to figure out, learn how much ever possible, and try to be good. In this process, I was also made a full time employee. The trust the company put in me to do good - scares me and excites me at the same time but I decided to keep one thing in mind -

“Get better, then get good“

I was reminding myself of this line for the time and even now to improve my knowledge in the scope of the work I am in. It is helping and currently I am learning new things everyday. The job is keeping me completely occupied and honestly feels good to go to work everyday.

So, that was all till november. Then came - December.

This last month was full of partying, drinks, less sleep, more laughter, more purchases, and much more.

First was the friends outing to a farmhouse to chill and it was an amazing day we spent dancing, drinking, having deep conversations.

Then we had our year end party form the company - No booze but the vibe was good at the end when we danced as a team. [also good photos]

Then I purchased iphone 17 [first big purchase of my own] and the feeling of owning something by yourself is rewarding and feels responsible.

With that new responsible feeling in heart, went to bangalore and felt the warmth of people from my office. Oh the hospitality was worth the trip. My managers, leads, teamamtes, and everyone else were super warm and welcoming. The two day trip felt short.

On the thrid day went out to party and cannot say much but it was the one and only trip but the best trip of 2025.

Came home, had christmas at home with my school friends and it was lovely to have everyone at my home with parents.

The coming sunday inviting few of my friends from work and that was a night to remember. We played games, had good food, got out a few personal things out of others. Mostly I got to meet my friends again to end the year in a good note.

All in all, 2025 started really low, but ended in such a high that I have nothing but good hopes for the year 2026 with some huge responsibilities on my shoulder.

with such a good month of december I am mentally good to keep my head down and work on my things for 2026.

There are personal goals for me this year but I want ot come back as a reflection after doing those rather than saying them out loud for accountability and then miss/stop after a while.

Keeping this good positivity as an end note, the year 2025 has been a year of transformation for me towards the good end and hoping to work hard and keep the balance somewhat similar this year too.

So to answer my own question of what did I do? I survived and made it out with good memories. Next year want more of personal actions working. So, will work on that.

Hope you had a good year as well. If not, please do keep in mind - Hope is a good thing. And no good thing ever dies.

Happy new year from your internet friend - Melvin Raj.

The Kite Runner is the first piece of work from Khaled Hosseini, published in 2003. (The year, my brother was born and I was 5 years old.) Story revolves around two friends from the same home but of ddifferent statures of Kabul, and how their lives evolve through the times of war, refuge, finding homes & lastly how the bond between the friends stay (I know this book has been ot a long time, but many haven’t read, so not spoiling it for them, incase they stumble here. I see you guys and I got you!)

Personal relationship with this book:

It took me a long time for me to finish this book as the story takes a huge, dark turn after what happens to the sweetest, humblest, and the kindest boy ever written.

I could not take it.

I left the book to be covered in dust in my shelf for months, till I read the part happening to Hassan, and what Amir does, and how that guilt he must always carry. But, what shocked me even more, was how morally kind was Hassan, to never bring it up and silently leave eventhough being it hard for their tribe of people elsewhere.

However, with the curiousity to finish this book and to know what happens further, I picked it up again, dusted it off and started reading again. What made me stop reading the book was only 50% of the tragedy that can happen to Hassan.

However, I am glad I finished this book.

It made me realize to live a good life, it takes strong will and might even be a short life, but a one worth living.

5 things I liked about this book:

1. The book was raw. How the scenes, environment was desccribed really pulls your imagination to make you believe you are in that scene with the characters watching silently, hearingg all around and noticing every details, without blinking. (Something that I am trying to learn in my writing.)

2. The characters, and how well they are written. From Hassan, Amir, to father, friends of father, from Soraya, to their father, and family, and lastly, the family of taxi driver, Farid who takes Amir around Afghanistan to find Sohrab.

3. The cultural showcase. The tribes, The food,, the attires, the class of people, and many more of different regions of Aghanistan.

4. The quick pace. (300+ page book, and it still feels rushed. Personal opinion.)

5. The open-ended redemption. Khaled didn’t give a happy ending but a possible beginning of a happy ending. This comes to say, that not everything needs closures and in writing especially, it can come to be open (what a relief as a writer😅. It leaves the pressure to make endings good). However, it depends on the stories too. This one needed no closure, per say, the ending what was given was enough to make us understand what happens next.

Favourites lines from the book:

1. For you, A thousand times over.

2. There is a way to be good again.

3. Better to get hurt by the truth, than be comforted with a lie.

4. The dessert weed lives on, but the flower of spring blooms and wilts.

5. The morning sun to my yelda.

One line that is a known one but well placed is ‘Zindagi Migzara’ (life goes on).

Final take:

Definitely a page turner & an emotional ride. It really captured & brings the emotions buried deep to the top and flow heavily. This kind of stories fills me with satisfaction that after all that is bad happens,a hope of a small good is what keeps us alive and the same thing in this book, kept me hooked.

More of what this world still keeps hidden from me,

More of the places my eyes have not yet seen,

More of the whispers I've only caught in passing,

More of the passions that ignite when others speak highly of them.

I need more of the food I've promised myself someday to taste-flavors waiting for me as unopened letters.

I need more of the roads that stretch ahead, inviting me to ride into their distance,

I need more of the sunsets that make the sky look as if it was on the canvas of a lover, painting the horizon in hues of orange and pink — the colors of his love.

I need more encounters with people who remind me that kindness is not naive -

but luminous, as bright and enduring as those sunsets.

And, above all,

I need more of myself.

For too long I have lived as my own shadow, knowing the shape of me but not the being.

Now I wait to stand whole, to be my own light and the shadow together

Because, I always have been more.

Story:

17 out of 18 children of the same class go missing from their homes at exactly 2:17am at night.

What happens to them, why was one student left behind, and what is the teachers role in this, along with the towns involvement in this case, makes the movie.

Review:

The story is normal, but the way it was told is amazing. It takes you on a journey from one character’s perspective to the other as chapters and ultimately leading to what happened.

What stood out is how director Zach Cregger intentionally skipped out the reasoning and just went on the - what happens part is good. Most horrors justify the horror, but this just goes with the notion of this happens, deal with this. Which was excellent.

Loved every artists performance in this film. Right from the missing children running with hands spread wide to the person of interest who comes very late in the film but leaves an impact (not revealing much for your surprise).

Really impressed by how little story can pull audiences and this was an amazing theatrical watch for me.

The music placements, the songs used and the background scores were good additions to the movie.

Definitely a watch and anbodyy can watch it. Just that first time horror-watchers in a theatre can be relaxed a bit as it is less on horror side and more on the suspense side.

I boxd. It became a thing now. And I am here for it.

So, if available in theatres near you, do watch it or wait for the OTT release and watch it on a Saturday night. Trust me, you will have sunday to recover if you are watching horror alone for the first time like me.

In his latest one, He just washes his face with the alcohol that he has after 30 years, and that little mannerisms he did felt worth my money.

Adding to that the tiny flashback scene and that one shot where he sits with the metal hook in hand, cigarette in other, was the thumbsup with an amazing Hyderabadi Dum Biryani to me.

I feel inspired watching this man’s movies. Yeah, he is struggling to dance, even to deliver his best but he is doing so with such grace that I have to go watch him in theatres.

Sidenote, that Chikitu Vibe intro step was so good to watch him do it.

He will forever be that guy, whom I will aim to be in my old age, doing what I love, hopefully, learn some of that style.

Hello, not to start a new year on a boring note, but I have been pondering with this question, whenever, I am in two-minds about figuring out if I want to keep working the job, while enjoying life and the challenges it brings. Or, focus on one thing, i.e, my job and look to bring as much financial security as possible and then decide to enjoy life.

I don’t know about others but personally, never once in my life did things pan out as I wished it to be. Not in career, not in relationships I seek, not in basic hobbies I want to set.

So, why will I focus on bringing all my best to one aspect of life when I have my undeniable proof that what I plan don’t happen.

Hence, I always conclude that whatever, I plan goes to the dump and I should let whatever happens, HAPPEN!

Now, I’m 26 and it feels as if I have seen the toughest days of my life which I know isn’t true and there are even more tougher days ahead. I just want to have the will to fight those. And in that fight I would want my interests ,hobbies, habits, and my overall lifestyle to support me rather than be a one-directional destination which I may-or may not be successful if pursued.

Also, let’s think that my life will go as I imagined it if I am working and planning to retire by 45-50 let’s say. For that, I will have to leave everything I love to do. Focus on increasing my efficiency at work, be the best damn person there is in one aspect and keep going at it for 20+ years.

Once I get to that age, I retire and then what? At 46, I can’t be at places looking for relationships, finding friendships, will probably not have energy to do things I can do now. Won’t have the will to travel (as I have very little now😅, that’s another thing). What will I do with keeping my bank digits good.

But, what if, I go without any plan of retiring early. I can keep working till I die. While also, writing, finding time in between to play games, read books, find friendships, relationships, and also make experiences that I want to without compromising.

Yes, my situation right now, is a bit on the bottom side of life, but it will not always be this way. It may go even down, but someday will rise back up and then I will be more optimistic about financial aspect of life.

So, to be retiring early, means to saccrifice a part of yourself. Which I am not sure I want to. Not now, atleast. I would rather be who I am right now with less burden financially till I am in to my late 40s and be creating something meaningful so that I can keep doing those till the day I die.

I don’t ever want to just retire and to be really honest, nobody ever truly retires. The concept of retirement is never truly explained and neither did it work out well.

Everyone either goes insane not doing anything or find new things to do. In that case, Why even consider retiring?

Not sure, what I wanted to write and this itch in my mind asked me to write about how I don’t want to retire and also to give reasons as why I don’t want to retire. The itch started when I saw the new music video of the song Chikitu Vibe from the unreleased film Coolie by Rajnikanth.

Watching him do the hook step , I realised, what a cool way to lead his 70s. Doing films he like and making even better movies than most youngsters.

That thought had me thinking - Is retiring a good thing? and then thought of others from different fields of work like Ratan Tata, Amitabh Bachchan, Ilaiyaraja, Javed Akhtar, Gulzar, among many others.

It’s not like they are into one field all the time, they explored other fields, while keeping one field as a base.

That is what I want to do. Keep working like them, bringing peace to myself doing so.

I may not have all the things I want but this way I don’t have to plan which from past convictions know will not work in my favour.

So, no retirement for me. I will drive a cab for the pleasure of driving if needed but won’t retire.

That’s my 2 cents on retiring and sharing here just because I had the itch and wanted to write in to document my thoughts on it.

Here’s to more unplanned wonderful experiences in 2025 to all you readers.

Happy new year’s.

It is one thing to listen to the songs when released and another thing seeing the artist perform live. I never understood the concept of listening the artist performing live when we can listen to it in the comfort of our room until I went ahead and gone to my first concert.

And I have to say, it was amazing. I never thought I’ll enjoy so much. Maybe it is because of the things going on in my life that I wanted to distract myself or could be that I changed because usually I am not a person who likes huge crowds, loud music and open arena gatherings.

I am kinda weird, I know.

However, as I said, I thouroughly enjoyed the Diljit Dosanjh’s Dil-luminati Tour in Hyderabad.

The concert was in the outskirts of Hyderabad (from where I stay, it is far), so we took my dad’s car drove up there. When we reached, we were parked a kilometer far than the actual place and walked all the way. These moments on that day felt tedious but now are a good memory to talk about.

When we arrived, there was an open stage, lots of people already occupying the front, but the real view was from a little back of the phase where we booked.

It was kinda nice, we get to talking about work, how things are going with each other, and such and around the time the concert was about to begin, lights turned red and the vibe changed.

It went from this open space to a closed one in an instant just with the light change. And in a few moments, Diljit arrived on stage with his intro song, a video about what music means to him and that switch in people from being excited to actually vibing to him was unreal.

This man knows his stuff and although the show was abruptly ended maybe because of the restrictions of the time, and restrictions on not to sing songs about drugs, alcohol from the state government and other stuff that probably wasn't meant to keep the show short. The environment he created had everyone vibing and moreover when he speaks he was captivating... talking about the full moon, the people of hyderabad, the reality of concert tickets being sold in black, about women and how independent they are, and finally how he became who he is now and more...

Nevertheless, I really really had a good time.

From thinking I'll just listen to the songs he perform and come home to dance heartfully to songs (I accept that a few songs I heard for the first time), the meet and greet of three people groups apart from my friends (an inside-joke), the songs ik kudi, lover, born to shine, kinni kinni, and bhool bulaiyaa title song were the best of the bunch.

There was a guitar solo in the song, ik kudi which was phenomenal to listen live. In that moment, I felt alive...and more importantly hopeful, because life felt lighter in that moment.

And I want to thank my friends for giving me a core memory to keep it in my good moments vault. The photos, the dances, the conversations, the laughters, and the videos (I created a reel of all the best moments of the concert.) we took are nothing less than treasure to me.

All I can say is if you think you are a certain type of person and you can’t have a good time. Maybe try it before making that assumption. Who know you might unlock a core memory that stays with you forever.

Sometimes, we don’t know what we like or want and during those times, experiencing different things might help make a choice rather than sticking to your comfort notions.

When you know the path to the destination and you intentionally keep the indicators on - you are going to face a lot of hurdles along the road.

If you know the end is straight ahead, there is no need to turn on the indicators, you can go about doing your work.

All humans have multiple interests. Nobody has one interest and keeps bringing their best at it. We are wired to be multi-potentialite.

Due to this hard wiring, we tend to make huge innovations because of the culmination of different interests along the way.

This is what I believe in. And I think it is true for every person.

But, sometimes to master something; you need to, for a brief moment - leave the rest and work on what's at hand.

It's not wrong to do so. It is what it is.

I was at that junction of doing multiple things at once and thinking it was okay and would be fine once I set a momentum.

That led to me being all over the place and delaying the things I actually wanted to do.

I was confused by the distance between what I wanted to do and what I was doing. It’s not wrong to have multiple interests but trying to do all at once is the part where I think I was making a mistake.

My interests keep changing from writing, reading, gaming, playing cricket, badminton, running, recording audio podcasts, playing snooker, learning to edit videos, sketching, and who knows what more.

This led to me stopping everything for a few months. Not that I did not do things at that moment. I played online FPS games, played cricket, and badminton sometimes, and wrote mini-posts. But couldn’t set a good amount of time for one thing because despite all this I have work to earn a living.

So, to run behind every interest in the limited time I got after work is tedious and sometimes I leave everything and simply doom-scroll, which I know is not good.

And after months of being stale, due to a lack of self-awareness and no direction, taking turns by blinking indicators at every interest I have. I left the road I was previously on and now I am trying to get back on it.

Hopefully, I will use my energy on things that matter to me now, have the most fun with them, and set clear goals so I don’t blink the indicators of my vehicle and turn towards any new interests.

Here are a few interesting highlights from the past few weeks:

1. I have heard a lot about the movie “Laapata Ladies“. I will be watching this sometime this week and will share a post on it. If you have already watched it, do share your thoughts on the movie. If you haven’t watched it, I guess I gave you a weekend movie suggestion (You’re welcome.)

2. The ICC T20 World Cup squad announced. Honestly, I am excited about this World Cup. With the ongoing IPL, the run chases, the top scores, and the individual one-upping with the best forms of everyone (Although, not sure of Hardik, hopefully, will bring his best in the World Cup). I am eager to see what we have in store and no matter what, we all bleed blue when the time comes. So, this squad looks promising to me, and my people to watch out from this squad would be - Samson, Pant, Dube, Bumrah, and of course Kohli (my favorite).

3. Summer is here and this summer it’s really really hot. The scorching temperatures need to chill a bit. To save your precious, necessary life that I know very little of - Here’s a tip: Keep a small-sized onion in your pockets. It helps in absorbing heat and prevent heat strokes. I humbly request all to be safe.

Thank you for reading. I will see you all soon in a new post. If you are here for the first time - please subscribe, so you don’t miss any posts.

Rising to fame or the top overnight is wonderful. But Rising to the top gradually over a period of time, with a place to view your journey is more meaningful to me.

And that takes time.

Today's is all about how instant fame is not the way to go when building creative habits but how the opposite structure is best suited to the end-goal of mine and possibly to all people looking to build creative habits into their routines.

Most people start their creative journey and instantly think of fostering a community and making money off it. But, that is not the case for every creator. Sure some creators do show the path mentioned above, but that is only because they might have done this 1000 times differently until finding the right one.

The problem is we view success as a stop to get down and settle and not as a stop to relax and get back on the journey. In order for us to build creative habits, we need to make sure that this line is always the first rule.

Creativity is a journey with no destination. Enjoying the journey is the only way to be truly satisfied with the habits and also bring that peace and serene state in different aspects of life.

Why the 100-hours rule?

In the ever-changing algorithmic social presence, we are always told to be relevant, and to be relevant means to be following the herd. It's not wrong.

It is just not the right way for building creative habits to bring peace and spark creativity.

If you keep running behind all the trends on social media, here are a few things I thought were impossible to achieve:

1. To find your style:
   Everyone has their unique way of telling their story and crafting ideas. By following the same trend, you are forcing yourself unconsciously to be the same as others. Although, it may seem as if it is just imitating others and no harm is done.

2. Finding peace while doing the creative habit:
   The only reason I started writing about building creative habits is because of the amount of peace and creativity it can bring to other parts of life.
   Sure, your job may not allow you to have the time or you personally can feel this is the only way but this way actually saves you from hours of mindless scrolling and increase your capacity to think on one particular thing.

3. Building something meaningful:
   This is for me personally, I never had the sense of satisfaction I was looking for while writing curated feed newsletters but ever since writing about building creative habits – I have been thrilled when a new idea strikes, or when I publish or create social media posts for it.
   

Also, in order for you to improve on something you need to work on something for at least 100 hours before stopping it. Since you are choosing your creative habits the things you love. It won't be an issue.

What's the 100 hours Rule?

This is a simple rule of mine for building creative habits.

You start a habit by choosing something you love. You get interested and start to push yourself. Over a period of time, you will start to do things so fast that you will only be thinking about it. But soon enough, the interest fades away.

To avoid this, I like to think of this experiment as the 100-hour creative run. It is every hour for 100 days, try building that creative habits and if you feel like this process is boring right until day 100th – stop and start building a new creative habit.

If you are interested in reading more about the why, what, and how of building creative habits – Sign up for this newsletter and keep reading more straight in your inbox.

Is it necessary to do it for 100 hours?

Absolutely not. You can define your hours yourself, but 3 months (10 days less) is a good time frame to decide if a creative habit is interesting to you or not.

Also, the majority of the reason is because of how fast we are moving to things once they seem slow or not so interesting. It will be an entire post on why relevance is not the way to build creative habits. For now, the 100-hour rule is not a compulsion but a good benchmark.

I liked the idea of writing and it is only when I decided to write about something every day for 50 days straight and then followed up by publishing a curation newsletter for a year that I fell in love with writing.

So, yes. It takes time to build and you need to give the time it deserves. After all, we are pursuing creative habits only to bring creativity into our lives and to slow down in this fast-paced world.

That is all for this post.

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P.S: If you are looking for some creative amalgamation of paintings and movies as a poster. Check out this post.